Several months in my search for a Tantra mentor I found an amazing woman (who will remain unnamed) referred to me by two trusted friends. I reached out to her via private Facebook message. I shared with her openly and honestly about who I am and what my work is in the world.
The first wave of shock came when I read her response which was a flood of attacks, name calling and essentially telling me I am scum piece of shit human who is hurting men.
The second wave of shock came the next morning when she posted our entire conversation publicly on her Facebook. I called my lawyer immediately as I was terrified of defamation of my character.
My body was physically trembling with fear as if there was a bear attacking me. With the support of a lot of VERY powerful friends, in a matter of days I was able to transform this painful and humiliating experience to that of expansion and deep gratitude for the gift this woman gave to me.
Here is the golden nugget – because I felt any pain or hurt by the words she spewed at me that means there was some part of me (deep in my unconscious) that believed what she was saying was true.
If there is a part of my unconscious self who believes that “I hurt men” then that is going to show up in my field when I am working with them.
Wow!! Because this woman was able to help me see where I was holding onto a deep story that was not serving my highest good, it was deep dark in the shadow, I was able to go to work. So work I did!
I am sure my Valentine, this anonymous woman, who vomited hatred at me (which was simply an expression of her pain – and I have immense compassion for this woman if there is that much pain inside) has no idea of the love and appreciation I feel for her.
She has been one of my greatest teachers.
This is one my favorite quotes by Kahlil Gibran
“I have learned silence from the talkative,
tolerance from the intolerant
and kindness from the unkind.
I should not be ungrateful to those teachers.”
Deep bow to my sister – I soooo appreciate your service to my journey. You are a sovereign being, and in your own time and in your own way, you too can be free of your pain!
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